Still Homesick

Home... where are you?

a place where i left a part of my heart...

this place here... is not really true.

it was always you, i knew it from the start...

crisp blue water...?

no, rather the muddy brown of a well traveled river...

no big huge yaht...

no, rather the breath taking speed of a small whirlwind.

i'd rather not buy my crabs...

no, i'll catch them myself...

lets string up the trot line

and bring in the "wealth"

I miss the land

where i use to run, free of worry

i miss the sand

where i could lay, not in a hurry

Long days, rising before the sun

out on the liquid gold

preparing for a crab run

but these crabs were not to be sold

Coming in before the blaze of the day

the crabs are fighting

but its time to season them with beer and oldbay

put the lid on the pot and start the fire lighting

What more could a little country girl ask for?

I miss my land

so vast, never ending

i knew it like the back of my hand

In the woods, all my time i'd be spending.

I miss running the trails

getting lost, but knowing exactly how to get home

the clouds looking like huge sails

& always collecting pinecones.

So much i could say about this old place

where my name is writtin in the dirt

and my heart will always have its base

but in no ones eyes but my own will it have so much worth.

-me (9/14/10)

I will always love hoco. the people, the places.

But my heart will always reside in southern md.

I will always want my farm back

I will always crave the smell of a salty river

No one will ever appreciate crabs as much as I (except my mother lol)

I will always enjoy fishing and still be oogied out about trying to get the fish off the hook.

I will never have a problem jumping into a river, unless it hasnt rained in a week or so...

because in that case there will be too many jellyfish.

The ocean will never be good enough, its not a substitute.

The city will never love me...

I will never like people enough to be stuffed into a small space with them

I will forever want to buy my own farm and stick my house right smack in the middle of the land.

And until all these things happen again, i will never be 100% happy...

Close? maybe... but not complete.

I will always run around with no shoes on...

I will climb trees barefoot until my bones tell me i cant.

I will always prefer to read in a tree then at a table.

My fear of the dark will haunt me for life...

But i miss being able to truly see the stars..

in a place where street lights dont exist.

This is just who I am... I can like other things, but i will always love this... <3

It hits me now, that the decisions I am making in my life, that places I intend to go, very well may mean I man never see another "bushy basket" again. (Bushy Basket- Bushel Barrel). Crabbing? I may never be able to do that again... I desperately want to go back home. Not to live, but to visit. I miss the water. The briney salty smell of the river. Low tide lol. The feel of the wind whipping my hair as Im driving the boat towards the island. The sun, kissing my skin, but i am going to fast for it to overheat me. I miss anchoring in the dead middle of the river and having a picknick in the direct sunlight. I miss really crabbing. Throwing the trot line off the side and letting the chicken necks tide to it do the work. Then scooping them up and throwing them in the boat, hoping you made it into the basket, most of the time you didnt. So there were 

I am going to make Brian or someone take me back home. I have to revel in my past, and I also want to share it. I want my significant other to know where I came from. Even if he doesnt share the same love for it that I do. He at least should know, See, feel, experience.

I need to see feel experience it again...Somedays, i just get soooo homesick :P